Yes, It Is Broken: Part 1

It keeps me up at night. It's a low-level fog in my mind that has made me uneasy in a way that's difficult to pinpoint. It makes me so angry I think about killing, about making changes with my bare hands around the throats of those who stand in the way, grinning. It makes me sad my anger has yet to find a productive outlet. I have difficulty expressing how I feel about it to those that know me, so I say nothing. Its scope is so large I can barely summon the effort required to search its contours and see it as a whole, but I refuse to stop.

What is it?

America. It's broken. How're we going to fix it?

We remain the "City upon a Hill", and make no mistake, the eyes of the world remain upon us.

Figuratively speaking, what John Winthrop and JFK spoke of runs through us, and has done so for nearly 400 years, whether we recognize it or not, whether we want it to or not, whether we believe it should or not.

Simply put, the United States of America can be, has been and will remain the world's best and most likely repository for hopeful human progress. As ever, this can only happen by example. At the moment, my heart has begun to break as I absorb the ways in which the very best of American exceptionalism evaporates before my very eyes.

My heart breaks just making this admission. For some time I've tried to tell myself things aren't as bad as they seem, that the filters through which I receive information skew things toward a sky-is-falling, "look what else is wrong with us" world view. In the face of that I've remained ever-optimistic, for I believe strongly--perhaps too strongly--in the strength of American institutions and American character--expressed both through its actions as a nation and in the character of its people.

At the moment, my optimism remains unbowed, but my faith in the strength of American institutions and character weakens daily. Where is the rot? What causes it? How can we renew ourselves and our nation?

I have a penchant for wearing bold colors, but damn if I don't feel like Johnny Cash right now:

I’d love to wear a rainbow everyday,
and tell the world that everything’s okay
But I’ll try to carry off a little darkness on my back
Till things are brighter, I’m the man in black.